winterstar95: (lightcap)
Wow I have been remiss and I apologize, but the very good news is that I dodged another bullet! My biopsy came back clear of cancer. Recuperation has been a little more painful and difficult than I thought, but I am so happy to report this! I just have to worry about the spot they found in my neck now (that was the bad news I heard before the surgery). They don't think it is anything, but will watch it over the next few months to make sure.

And onto the updates Stop reading here if you don't want to know about the many writing projects )
winterstar95: (brave)
To report I am still around - the surgery went well. I am still in some pain, but expect it will taper off as I heal. The results won't be back for a bit, so I have to try not to think about whether or not I am collecting cancers as a new hobby or not. This procedure is supposed to be both diagnostic and therapeutic. So if I do have cancer, if I have clean margins I am essentially good to go. Laying around for the rest of the weekend, may telework on Monday if I still don't feel well enough.

A mighty hi to all the WC folks at the meet up. I miss you all.

And a mighty hi to all my MCU folks and SG1 folks. Fandom is the best!
winterstar95: (wakeupSteve)
Sorry I have been missing in action lately. Just a quick note or two:

1. I go in for more cutting and biopsing on Thursday.

2. Had some crappy results last Wednesday. Cried a river, but hell I'm still here now, right?

3. I think I've watched CA:TWS like a dozen times since I down loaded it!

4. To all my WC peeps going to the meet up - have fun. Wish I could go but I will be recovering from #1. Please report!!

I have been reading - and thinking about everyone! Hope all is well.
winterstar95: (dragonmom)
Some quick updates for anyone out there - sometimes I think I'm talking to the tumbleweeds....Rambling rambles )
winterstar95: (lightcap)
Let's be honest about something. Even though I've produced a great number of words this year already, something is definitely wrong. Since my cancer diagnosis and the surgery, something has been off. Writing hasn't been easy, but a struggle. I can write - don't get me wrong - but there's a halting quality to it that I just don't like.

I am writing and sometimes I am enjoying, but I have to say my stamina left the building when I lost my thyroid. I'm doing okay, overall, but I don't have the same brain capacity anymore. Something is foggy up there. This is particularly worrisome because while I think I can handle one WC rev BB, I cannot handle two. I signed up for two. I don't know what I am going to do now. I have one nearly finished. But the other one hasn't been touched. This should not have been a problem - last year it wasn't even an issue. I've clocked myself and I can put out 1000 words/30 minutes. It is EASY for me. But unfortunately, I'm jumbled and tired a lot at night. I can't handle the load I used to be able to handle last year. I wrote four stories at the same time last year! Without a problem!! But I can't handle two!!

Help!

Ugh!

Life changes sometimes suck.
winterstar95: (preserum)
Well, I went to the nuclear medicine department today and swallowed the pill. Everyone says it is a gray pill, I don't know because the technician just tipped it into my mouth and yep I swallowed radiation. I am emitting gamma rays right now and may turn into She-Hulk at any moment. Day 1, first hour - all very Surreal......

Big week -

Jan. 20th, 2014 12:50 pm
winterstar95: (preserum)
I start my treatments this week Here we go! )

PLEASE DO NOT SAY I WILL BE GLOWING. It irritates the hell out of me.
winterstar95: (brave)
Okay my ass is not lazy - actually I have no idea what you might classify it as - though it does have a tattoo. Anyone want to guess More meaningless rambles here )
winterstar95: (preserum)
So this is going to be a long rambling vent Venture to the Rant )
winterstar95: (preserum)
In my elation the other day when I received the results from my biopsy my brain was not functioning. When the biopsy was performed the doctor said it would be considered inadequate because she couldn't get all the samples she wanted. With that in mind I have to accept the fact that there is a high possibility that the pap smear is correct and the biopsy was just a false negative. It happens all the time. So, with that in mind and my brain functioning a little better, I am calling up my primary care physician and getting her to discuss with my gynecologist about a pap in 6 months instead of a year. If it turns out positive again, I can probably just get the procedure to clean everything up and all will be good again. Why am I writing this? I don't know maybe anxiety, maybe just to force myself to face reality and what I have to do.

Thanks all for your support!
winterstar95: (wakeupSteve)
Okay, celebrations are in order because at this time there will be no further funking around with my cervix. There is no sign of dysplasia but there is active HPV (80% of women in the US are positive for HPV at some time in their life if they've ever had sex with some one who isn't a virgin- you get the idea). It is one of those viruses that hangs out in your system for years waiting for your immune system to get overtaxed. Obviously this happened to me with the thyca. So what does this all mean? I still have a risk of developing cervical cancer, it is still lurking waiting to hit me, but if I keep boosting my immune system, I should be able to fight off the active HPV and make it latent again. So yes there's no sign of cancer at this time. \o/. The caveat? The biopsy was inadequate - because well that's a whole other story about how my cervix might be considered the gates of MorDor as far as opening. I won't get into that, because it is a long story. I just have to keep it monitored and watched and all should be good.

And as I said, JFC I'm going to have a freaking stroke from all the stress.
winterstar95: (planedown)
I am leaving an important meeting to go to get my biopsy results today. I am sick to my stomach over it. I have to drive over an hour back to the doctor's office. They would not tell me anything over the phone, I'm so nervous I think I might puke. I am also having some strange and disturbing effects from the biopsy which does not help my frame of mind at all. I will post later when I find out.

God, I am so scared.

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